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Coping with a break up

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Coping With Relationship Break-Up

Break up is painful, and whatever the reason, no matter how your feelings for the person may have changed, coping with a break up can be painful and distressing. It’s usually a feeling of guilt about the way it all ended compounded by a fear of the future and where things will go, it can take time to get over it and get back out into the real world, but you will.

When a marriage or relationship breaks up it we normally associate the feelings of  loneliness with the loss of the person but in reality it is often the sudden change in circumstances and daily routine that throw our emotions out of kilter. We have been used to coming home every evening for the last few years and having someone to talk about our day to, moan about the boss or the silly customers you have, now you have no one to do that with. You might miss sitting down at the table and sharing a meal with someone or even something so simple as just having another person in the house with you, another body in the room, someone to look at even if you don’t talk. The break up of routine and the feeling of abandonment can make the whole situation feel like there is no light at the end of the tunnel but with time you will see those routines can be compensated with new things.

relationship breakdown

Spend time with people

Get yourself out there and spend time with some friends, have a laugh and a drink and try to remember your life before you were in your relationship, get used to being you again without needing to take another person’s view or feelings into account. Take up a hobby, do something that takes your mind off of what you’ve lost, fill your time with things to do, join the gym, but don’t just sit at home a stew on what went wrong, it’s unhealthy to concentrate on things you can’t change. If you find yourself having difficulty getting the person you have split with off your mind then have a chat with someone, call a friend and talk to them about it, they will remind you of how unhappy you both were and that what you have done has been best for both of you.

Avoid the rebound

At all cost avoid the rebound relationship, it can be common practise to run out and try to fill that void with someone else who you think can give you back that routine you enjoyed with your ex, rushing into a relationship for the wrong reasons will get you back in exactly the same situation, you need to take time to find the right person for the right reasons, get over the feeling of loss and build a new life for yourself before you can introduce a new person to it. Being comfortable in your own skin, discovering who you are and learning to enjoy your independence will help you to fill the space left by a person with new experiences and happy memories.



About Steven Petter

About Steven Petter

Steve has three children, Connor, Harmony-Skye and Fletcher. He is a Martial Arts enthusiast as well as an avid reader of books about Philosophy, he began writing short stories and also writes music reviews.

Website: Steven Petter

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