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Dealing with more than you can handle

Dealing with more than you can handle
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There is a saying that life only throws what you can handle at you, but there are times when it seems something has gone awry and you have been dealt a much tougher hand that you feel you can deal with.

The natural response at a time like this is to resist what is happening by rallying against it, but in actual fact this will only make things feel far worse. The feeling of not being able to cope with life is at the root of most people’s breakdowns, so it’s a very important feeling to listen and respond to.

So what are the best strategies during times like these?

Well it’s not rocket science but in times of stress the simplest approaches often go out of the window so it can be very useful to just have an outline of a three step plan for intensely demanding times.

Ask for help

Dealing with more than you can handleStep one is to ask for help. As a culture we are rubbish at this, and even though we are several decades on from the stiff upper lip years, most of us have still been imprinted with beliefs of the superiority of independence. Well in times of pressure, reaching out is probably the single best thing you can do for yourself because it is very likely that your perspective will not be clear, you will be seeing things through the lens of pressure and stress, and fear will be running the show!

Talk to someone that you trust and who you believe have your best interest at heart. Tell them that you need to offload, that you need to say everything even if it sounds crazy and very politically incorrect! Then with their help see if you can start to make sense of how you are feeling and the decisions that you need to make.

Take the pressure off – any way you can!

The second step is to do anything to take the pressure off. Cancel things that don’t have to happen and even things you feel have to happen, if you simply can’t handle it and feel that you genuinely don’t have the resources to cope with. Again ask for help with your responsibilities and delegate, delegate, delegate!

Give yourself as much slack as you can go for a ‘good enough’ approach to life rather than anything in the region of perfect, and make choices that support ease and acceptance.

Look after yourself

Lastly, and probably most importantly, look after yourself on every level. Eat well, get as good sleep as you can and get some exercise even if it’s just a little bit of walking outside. All of this will send positive messages to your nervous system to help settle the internal stressors and calm everything down.

 

 

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About Jenny Smith

About Jenny Smith

Jenny Smith is a freelance writer and facilitator specialising in mental health, well-being and ecotherapy. She writes for National Mind and The Working Parent and facilitates training in the Work that Reconnects and Ecotherapy. She is inspired by nature, gardening, love and non-duality teachings

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