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Is it wrong to be too soft with kids

Is it wrong to be too soft with kids

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We’ve all heard it. Sometimes it’s said straight out, other times it’s mumbled under the breath. It may not have directed at your children’s behaviour but chances are you’ve heard someone say something along the lines of “They’re too soft on that kid” or “In my day I’d have got a clip around the ear for that.”

Parenting styles have certainly changed over the past few decades and, for some, that means parents are now being too soft on their kids. But what does being too soft mean and is there really anything wrong with it?

Being ‘soft’

No parent likes to see their child upset and so it sometimes seems easier and kinder to let things go or play down their tantrums, outbursts or misdemeanours. While this is sometimes the best way to tackle attention-seeking behaviour, it can be detrimental in the long run. Without a consistent approach to discipline, children will struggle to learn acceptable social behaviours and be less likely to develop self-control.

You don’t have to be the baddie

However, giving your child a telling off doesn’t have to make you seem like the bad guy. Think of yourself as being more like a teacher than a police officer. As long as kids recognise why they are being disciplined and learn from the experience it doesn’t have to be a horrible encounter. Try introducing positive rules like ‘Be kind to each other’ or ‘Be respectful’ and encourage good behaviour rather than reacting to naughtiness all the time.


There’s no denying that children need some form of discipline. Without it they’d get into all sorts of annoying, disrespectful and most importantly, dangerous behaviours. No two children are the same and what works for one won’t necessarily work for another, but kids need to learn that there are consequences to their actions. This means disciplining, in a respectful manner, from an early age.

Is it wrong to be too soft with kids

Be consistent

If you’re not consistent in your approach to discipline then your children will end up confused and try to get away with a lot more. Explain clearly how you expect them to behave and set out consequences for bad behaviour. Then stick to your agreement. It’s important that children trust their parents so if you make a promise, be sure to keep it.Love

Discipline at home allows children to feel safe in their environment knowing their parents care deeply about them. It also affords them the opportunity to develop self-discipline as they grow up. Whether your style of parenting is strict or more lenient, the important thing is that your children know where the boundaries lie and that they feel loved, even when they are in trouble.



About Maria Brett

About Maria Brett

Maria is a freelance writer with over 10 years' experience producing content for a variety of publications and websites. When not working or looking after her two gorgeous sons, she can usually be found playing flugelhorn in a brass band, helping out at her local hospital radio station, shouting at the television while watching Formula 1, at the cinema or plonked on the couch with a cold glass of wine.

Website: Maria Brett

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