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Pros and cons of stay at home dads

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Stay at home dads

With more and more women becoming career focused and the balance of opportunity being weighed more fairly between man and women, there is more call for men with families to stay at home and take on the roles and responsibilities traditionally seen as mum’s. More and more dad’s are hanging up the hard hat to stay at home to take care of the kids and keep the family home in tip top condition, there are  pros and cons of stay at home dads and for many men who have taken the plunge, it is often a very fulfilling experience leading to greater relationships with their children.

Building a stronger bond with your children

For many men who feel that their wives have a stronger bond with their children because they carried them for nine months,stay at home dads the chance to stay at home with children before they go to school can build a stronger bond than if they were at work for a majority of the time. Later on, when the child goes to nursery or school then it’s the chance for the man to indulge in hobbies or other activities they may not have had the opportunity to otherwise. For example,  if you have a love for DIY then it may give you the chance to get on with some of the tasks around the home that would have had to wait until the weekend normally. Now you’re free at the weekends to enjoy time with your wife and children as a family instead of completing jobs around the house.

For men who have an interest in writing, graphics or computer programming, but do not have the experience or skills to make it a full time profession they can squirrel away a few hours a day when the kids are at nursery or even taking a nap to indulge in these pass times.

Working from home in the evenings

For some dad’s it may be a case that they don’t give up work to stay at home, it could be that you work in the evenings when mum is at home with the children and you are there in the mornings and afternoons for the school run. For example,  if you are a Door Supervisor or you work in retail, your hours may suit this kind of lifestyle and take away the need for expensive child care. Being a stay at home dad may give you skills that you were lacking in before, such as organisational skills, the ability to deal with complex emotional issues affecting your kids, cookery and even social skills when meeting others parents in the  park or at the school gates.

Keep focused

The downside of being a stay at home dad may be feelings of worthlessness for not being the bread winner and in some cases feeling emasculated by not being able to provide for your family financially, relying on your wife to fund family life or even being envious of friends who go to work every day. You may feel like you have wasted a lot of your life if you have trained or spent time doing a particular job, say being a mechanic, and now you are not using those skills in order for your wife to earn more money. If you don’t use these skills on a regular basis then you may find they start to diminish and you lose your edge.

The ups and downs

In some cases you might take the plunge to be a stay at home dad and find that you don’t have the skills to organise your day to complete everything you need to do, you may not build the emotional bond with your children your were expecting to and then become disheartened or stressed. You may also find that being the only dad at playgroup surrounded by an army of mothers you have very little in common with them and as a result find nothing to talk about and end up being isolated at the school playground, play group or park.

As with any dramatic career change you will find there are ups and downs and you should not rush into any decision that may not be the right one for you or the family. Expect it to be hard and don’t expect to be able to spend all day getting on with things you want, you may be able to palm off the odd hour here and there but keeping the house spit spot and keeping the kiddies fed and watered is top of the agenda. If you’ve got the right attitude and would like to try your hand at being a stay at home dad then it definitely has it’s advantages, so why not give it a try.

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One Response to “Pros and cons of stay at home dads”

  1. Lee

    My husband has beenn a stay at home dad for a few months now in all he does is complain. he is absolutely miserable being home having to care for the kids and take them to school and take care of the house and cook dinner. we argue all the time even more now than ever and he tells me that I don’t listen to him. just tired of hearing you complain about family wasting staying home he charles to quit his job and now all the stress is on me financially. I mean I’ve stayed home and cared for my kids many times while he work I don’t understand why is it that he can’t do the same. Uf someone could please hwlp me because im sick of his complaining

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About Steven Petter

About Steven Petter

Steve has three children, Connor, Harmony-Skye and Fletcher. He is a Martial Arts enthusiast as well as an avid reader of books about Philosophy, he began writing short stories and also writes music reviews.

Website: Steven Petter

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