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Tips for mending a broken heart

tips for mending a broken heart

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Bridget Jones may have set the trend for drinking wine, eating chocolates and singing ‘all by myself’ after the end of a relationship, but we all deal with relationship breakdowns in different ways. Some might quickly pick themselves up and dust themselves off while other may grieve over their loss for many months and feel they will never get over it.

We all go through relationship breakdowns at some point in our lives so here are some tips for mending a broken heart:

Accept you’re single

Accept the relationship has ended and grieve for it. You can’t expect to hold yourself together with plasters forever, so go through that pain and let your emotions out in order to get over it and move on.  After you’ve gone through the intense raw emotions, don’t wallow in self pity but start to fill the gap your ex has left in your life. That doesn’t mean rushing into a new relationship, but learning that you don’t need another person to make you happy, you can do that on your own! Revel in your new freedom and start to see singledom as something that’s fun and exciting.

coping with loneliness as a single parent

Try new things

Take the opportunity to do things you either didn’t have time for or that your ex didn’t want to do. It might be learning a new language, going on holiday with the girls or lads, doing pole dancing lessons or booking a supercar driving experience. You might meet new friends and fill up your social diary, forgetting about the hurt you were experiencing.

When we’re so consumed in our own sadness, we often forget that other people are often going through the same or worse. It can be helpful to help someone else now and again to take your mind off your own pain and helping other people naturally gives us that feel good feeling. Often if someone else is going through a much worse ordeal than us, it can put things into perspective a little to realise it’s just a broken heart and you will get over it.

tips for mending a broken heart

You’re great!

If you’ve been dumped, it’s easy to fall into the trap of believing it was your fault, you weren’t good enough and you’re not worthy. This is not true, so remind yourself just how great you are. Write a list of all the things you’re good at and what you’re proud of. Putting pen to paper and reading your words out loud is a simple yet effective way of re-enforcing your positive attributes and remembering you really are worth it!

If you’ve any doubts about your ex, use the same technique to list all of their bad qualities, all those little things that annoyed you and why you’re better off without them. This will help you stop seeing them through rose tinted glasses and re-enforce why they aren’t needed in your life anymore.

Ask for help

The break down of a relationship can really hit some people hard, so if you find yourself really struggling to deal with your emotions, speak to your family and friends about what you’re going through. They can offer advice or a shoulder to cry on and should support you through your tough times.

Try writing down your feelings in a diary or expressing your emotions in other ways such as poetry or music. If you’re hurt and angry with your ex then write everything down in a letter but don’t send it. It can be quite a cathartic experience and stops you bottling up bad feelings within.  If you are worried you’re becoming depressed then speak to your doctor, its very normal to go through depression when a relationship ends, especially a marriage or significant relationship so don’t be afraid to seek professional help to get you through and help you recover.

tips for mending a broken heart

Refresh your life

Whether you get a new haircut, indulge in a little retail therapy or give your home a spring clean and revamp, these small things can signify a new beginning for you. Throw old C Ds, pictures or unwanted items and occupy your mind re-arranging furniture, your wardrobe or desk. It’s easy to be constantly reminded of your ex which it turn may stir up feelings of sadness, so clear out the clutter and create a new you. Of course its perfectly acceptable if you want to keep certain trinkets or memento’s from your ex, they played a part in your life and may have made some happy memories, but for the time being, move any personal keepsakes out of the way and into a box, it will help you heal quicker and also keep your mind focused instead of dwelling on what was.

The future’s bright

Even if you’ve had your heart torn out and ripped into a million pieces, remember that it will heal and you will love again. You may go into new relationships with more caution and if you were hurt badly, it may take a while to love and trust again, but try and remember your new partner isn’t your ex and not to tar them with the same brush. Being in love can be the most amazing experience and a broken heart or two along the way is the price we sometimes pay until we find Mr or Miss Right.



About Rebecca Robinson

About Rebecca Robinson

After spending the last 8 years juggling life as a mum of two, wife and working full time as a Project Manager for a global telecommunications company, Rebecca Robinson made the decision to follow her love of writing and took the plunge; turning her passion into a full time career. Since becoming a full time writer, Rebecca has worked with various media and copy-writing companies and with the ability to make any topic relevant and interesting to the reader, now contributes to The Working Parent on articles ranging from credit cards to teenage relationships. Ever the optimist, Rebecca's dreams for the future include a house in the country filled with children, dogs and horses in the field!

Website: Rebecca Robinson

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